valentinos

A hot meal

Two starving homeless men are walking down an empty street in a quiet town. they spy a dead horse on the side of the road and run towards it. the first man begins to eat the horse, but the second man refuses, saying only that he will wait. after the first man has eaten his fill they continue on down the road. eventually the first man gets sick from the horse meat and throws it up. the second man pulls out a napkin from his pocket and exclaims as he sits down: "now THIS is what i've been waiting for! a hot meal!"

10/07/10 · 0 comentarios · Autor: valentina ·

A hearty breakfast

A man goes into a greasy spoon-type cafe and he says, "I would like one of your special full English breakfasts". "No problem." Comes the greasy little fat girls reply from behind the counter. "But I want it MY way." says the man. "What do you mean your way?" comes the reply. The man says, "well, I what the eggs only just about done so they look like I have snotted on them." he says. "I want the baked beans done so they are baking hot on the top, and freezing cold on the bottom. I want the bacon stuck to the plate with grease, with more rind than actual bacon. I want fried bread so greasy that the grease trickles in to the snotty egg and beans." "I dont have the time to do all that!" came the reply from the greasy little fat girl. "WELL YOU FUCKING HAD TIME YESTERDAY!!!!!!!" came the reply.

10/07/10 · 0 comentarios · Autor: valentina ·

Why does Helen Keller wear tight pants?

- So people can read her lips.

10/07/10 · 0 comentarios · Autor: valentina ·

A fellow, who had spent his whole life in the desert...

A fellow, who had spent his whole life in the desert, comes to visit a friend. He'd never seen a train or the tracks they run on. While standing in the middle of the railroad tracks one day, he hears this whistle -- Whooee da Whoee! -- but doesn't know what it is.

Predictably, he's hit and is thrown to the side of the tracks. It was only a glancing blow, so he was fortunate to receive some minor internal injuries, a few broken bones, and some bruises.

After weeks in the hospital recovering, he's at his friend's house attending a party one evening. While in the kitchen, he suddenly hears the teakettle whistling. He grabs a baseball bat from the nearby closet and proceeds to batter and bash the teakettle into an unrecognizable lump of metal. His friend, hearing the ruckus, rushes into the kitchen, sees what's happened and asks the desert man, "Why'd you ruin my good tea kettle?"

The desert man replies, "Man, you gotta kill these things when they're small."

10/07/10 · 0 comentarios · Autor: valentina ·

How can you identify an blind pirate?

He's the one with patches over both eyes.

10/07/10 · 0 comentarios · Autor: valentina ·

What's Michael Jackson's favorite hobby?

What's Michael Jackson's favorite hobby? Blowing bubbles.

10/07/10 · 0 comentarios · Autor: valentina ·

Algún error encontrado en la Templati

A hot meal

A hearty breakfast

Why does Helen Keller wear tight pants?

A fellow, who had spent his whole life in the desert...

How can you identify an blind pirate?

What's Michael Jackson's favorite hobby?

Sobre valentinos

Fotos

Mis tags

Secciones